Innocent looking faces – aren’t they.

These are the mug shots taken after these two were booked for causing great problems – on leap day of all days.

The little bird on the left – one of our most recent heritage breed turkeys to hatch (2 weeks old) – was found guilty of pooping all over the clean and folded laundry – in the laundry basket – in the incubation room (sometimes used for laundry).

In addition, the charges of pooping on wood floors -all the way down the hall and jumping into an open base cabinet in the kitchen were  filed.  The culprit was found guilty as charged.  All of these offenses took place while ‘Mother-the-Goose’ was being incarcerated for her part in attempted murder. . . .

You heard me right.  Murder!  You see, late on the afternoon of February 29, 2016, Mother-the-Goose (that’s her mob name – we just call her Mother) intentionally pushed Christmas and Thanksgiving (two bronze turkeys) – head first into a pond from which they could not escape.  These birds were only attempting to get a drink – when they were rear-ended by the assailant.  We found them at the scene, semi-submerged in the pond- shivering with cold, and exhausted from their futile attempts to escape certain death.

The culprit had not yet left the scene of the crime -and was found in a state of near hysteria – hissing and snickering at the plight of the victims.

The goose was booked and charged with attempted murder, laughing at the plight of the unfortunate, and harassing of first responders.  She has been warned, and released, with the understanding that continuance of this behavior will result in the death penalty.  The only question that remains is how to serve her. . . . literally.

So, for those who may romanticize about the life on the Homestead, imagining us relaxing on the porch, or in the backyard, or under the trees – enjoying our beautiful surroundings, this is how things really are!  After Dave and I spent more than two hours blow-drying two very wet, nearly frozen turkeys, being beat by the wings of an ungrateful bird, fixing a secluded warm area of their enclosure (to keep them from freezing during the night) we returned to the house – to change into clean, dry clothes and fix dinner- only to find ourselves in the middle of ‘poop-gate’ – and trying to apprehend the little perpetrator in the kitchen.    More cleaning, more incarceration – more reading of the riot act.  By about 9:30 p.m., the crime scene was cleared, evidence removed and things were back to normal.  This is really how we roll here.

As a follow up – the two turkeys warmed up nicely (no, not in the oven) and are doing fine.

The pooper flew the brooder coop 3 more times while we were cleaning up – resulting in he and the remainder of his little flock being moved into a maximum security facility.  Luther – now two months old and the size of a small pterodactyl – and his little buddy have been moved into their quarters in ‘the big house’ – where they will continue to eat, and eat, and eat.

The soiled laundry -Well, thanks to Oxy-Clean, most of it survived.

As for Leap-Day – I was so looking forward to having an extra day – a gift. . . . .

Let’s just say, I am grateful it only happens once every four years!  I don’t think I could handle them any more frequently!

 

Kathy